Spring Cleaning...Just a Sweep Away

Toastmasters Speech 8 from the Competent Communicator Manual - "Get Comfortable with Visual Aids."

Have you ever wondered how you'd feel if you'd just dust off that table? Reach up and sweep out those cobwebs in the ceiling? Run a powerful vacuum over those neglected tresses of carpet? Well, wonder no more. Today, I intend to convince you to embrace spring cleaning for all of the immense advantages it can provide.

Good afternoon Toastmaster Chair, Fellow Toastmasters and Most Welcome Guests.

With the winter season now in our rear-view mirrors, we embrace the signs of spring. The loss of that chill in the air, the growing brightness of the sun's rays, and the happy chirping of birds as they belt out their song.

In our society, springtime carries a certain obligation. We can no longer use the dark grey winter skies to mask the dust bunnies that grow wild in our laundry room, or ignore how the crystal in our dining room chandeliers has lost its sparkling lustre. Somehow, we sense it and we know. It's time to welcome the spring season with ritual cleaning.

Has anyone here ever quietly pondered where this ritual came from but was too afraid to ask? Ponder quietly in shame no more. According to Suite101.Com, one theory is that spring cleaning is thought to date back to the Jewish rite of Passover, with respect to families clearing out their households of any leavened bread in preparation for the holiday. Another theory is that it stems from the Persian New Year Celebration, whereby families clean everything in their homes - also known as "shaking the house."

I am here to tell you that spring cleaning need not be a dreaded, unglamorous chore. It can bring you great benefits. The first, you will feel invigorated. Imagine how virile you will feel after washing down those grimy windows, those very same windows which have taken a brutal assault from Old Man Winter. Having conquered the windows, you move on to cleaning the ceiling fan, with renewed strength, you tackle those blades, one by one.

Very obviously, there is a second benefit to the spring cleaning process which goes hand in hand with all of that bursting vigour; it is the exercise you're doing. Cleaning the carpet and rugs requires constant movement, not to mention arm and leg coordination. With all of that activity going on, you are bound to give your heart and lungs a good workout. The experts over at the Mayo Clinic point out that physical activity can help you ward off diseases such as Type II diabetes, osteoporosis and even certain types of cancer.

What happens when you exercise? You feel better and the vanity gods are begging me to say...you look better; which brings me to benefit number three. After all, you've built up quite a workout routine, one that would rival any celebrity DVD out there, and for you astute marketers out there, think of the unique branding possibilities: I’m not just a Toastmaster but a Spring Cleaning Fitness Guru too. We’ll need to work on that title.

From the vigorous window washing, precise yet intense ceiling fan blade cleaning, carpet and rug scouring, and knowing how much enjoyment you must have felt from those accomplishments, you probably meticulously cleaned the grout on your bathroom tiles with a toothbrush. By now, you must be looking as fit as Arnold Schwarzenegger or Madonna. Your spring cleaning efforts have borne fruit - you are looking better and dare I say it, younger. Who remembers that Oil of Olay commercial from 1989 with the military pilot and his former teacher? Well, if you don't, I will provide the gist. A striking woman walks through an aircraft hangar and is recognized by a pilot. With bravado, he tells her that "you were in my class." She replies with haughty sophistication, "I was your teacher." Now, wouldn't such an encounter feel great? It can happen...when you start spring cleaning.

A time honoured tradition, with deep historical roots, the spring cleaning ceremony is one to be taken on and entered into with great joy and expectation. The simple tasks of vacuuming, window washing, and dust bunny busting; will reap unimaginable rewards. I urge to you to make haste and not delay in throwing yourself with jubilant abandon into this ritual. Do the tango with your feather duster, run free with your vacuum, hop and skip with your broom. An invigorated, fit, more youthful you is just a sweep away.